Woman in a Christmas setting on a laptop with a hot drink

Own your singleness this festive season

Christmas is here, and soon it’ll be New Year’s Eve! Shopping, carol services, Christmas lights, mulled wine and maybe the occasional party. For some singles, the festive season conjures up feelings of joy and thoughts of cosy nights in. For others, it comes with some trepidation; another family get-together with the same old questions – ‘What’s new with you?’, ‘Dating anyone?’ And of course, the classic ‘When are you getting married?’

A couple of years ago I came across Twitter user Emily Seawright’s photo of her family’s festive Christmas card, in which she was standing beside her siblings and parents, who held signs declaring their respective statuses- ‘Expecting’, ‘Engaged’, and ‘Excited’. Seawright held up her own hilarious sign, which simply reads ‘Emily’. What followed was a deluge of responses, retweets, and the hashtag, ‘WeAreAllEmily’. Many know what it’s like to feel like you’re the only one who hasn’t got anything exciting to share. So, if you’re feeling a bit like Emily, here are five ways to own your singleness this festive season.

Treat yourself

Who said you have to be in a relationship to have all the fun? Buy that thing you’ve had your eye on (it might even be in the sales). Go see that movie. Enjoy a day at the spa.  You can invite friends along, or go alone if you have to. Don’t lose out on something that you enjoy just because you’re not in a relationship. In this age of social media, you just need to send out one tweet and you might find lots of people willing to join you on your next adventure!

Accept the invitation

You may be dreading that dinner party because you don’t have a date but could you look at it another way? Take a deep breath and go to the party. Arrive early and help out the host if possible, so that you’re fully comfortable by the time other guests start to arrive. People may be feeling as uncertain as you, so take the initiative and start some conversations. You never know, right?

Make your days count

Set out goals. Is there something you’ve always wanted to do? The holidays are the perfect time to reflect on what you would like to see happen in 2020. Take steps towards learning that musical instrument you’ve always wanted to master. Or you may want to start penning a few words of that book you’ve always dreamt of publishing. Studies have shown that people who plan towards their goals are more likely to meet them, so what’s on your list?

Purposefully sow into people’s lives

The Bible talks about sowing and reaping, giving and receiving. But it is clear that it is more blessed to give than to receive. So, phone a friend you haven’t spoken to for some time. Send a card or thoughtful note. Visit someone you know could do with a visitor this time of the year. Give of yourself to others and watch your heart fill with joy.

Be positive

A positive attitude draws people to you. Instead of moaning about the fact that you’re single at this time of the year, be thankful for all you have, and that you’re alive to see another Christmas and new year. Enjoy the season whilst it lasts (it’s the most wonderful time of the year, as the saying goes!) and look forward to what the new year holds.

Whatever you decide to do this season, wishing you a blessed and happy Christmas and joyful new year.

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